As I walked into church on Sunday, my eye immediately turned to 2 young women in our ward. The first girl had on a beautiful Prom dress which she had worn to the dance the night before. The dress was stunning and her hair was beautifully curled. She looked like a Princess.
The second girl walked in and immediately caught my eye because of the beauty of her smile, but my eye was quickly drawn away from her smile as I noticed her too-short, figure hugging shirt and skirt, and I sadly realized that the beautiful smile was "upstaged" by her inappropriate, and immodest, dress.
I watched as my 14 year old and 12 year old noticed exactly what I had, and it took every effort not to jump in front of them and cover their eyes.
I'm not judging.
In fact, I know the 2nd girl. I know her sweet spirit. I know her testimony. I know she comes from a wonderful family with loving, supportive parents.
Would someone who didn't know her assume that she has a sweet spirit and strong testimony?
Sadly, they probably wouldn't.
Many comments were made on Facebook the other day, as well, about the "strange", "quirky", and "weird" ways that the LDS girls try to make their Prom dresses modest. From what I understand, it is nearly impossible to find a dress that has sleeves. They are either strapless, or have plunging neck lines or backs. I received a link to this
video, which really got me thinking about the subject of Modesty.
It's a touchy subject for many people, although, I don't really understand why.
In my mind, you are either modest in your actions and dress, or you are not.
It's pretty black and white to me.
I have to admit, however, as I write this, that I know I wasn't always modestly dressed when I was in my teenage years. It's something that I look back on now and wonder if I totally missed the modesty lesson in class, or if it wasn't as emphasized as it is now. It's one of those things that I wish I could go back and change about myself.
As a mom of 4 boys, my perspective has completely changed, because now I am seeing things through their eyes. I'm understanding their thought processes. I'm seeing, from a different angle, why modesty is so important.
1 Corinthians 3:16-17 says: "Know ye not that ye are the temple of God, and that the Spirit of God dwelleth in you?...The temple of God is holy, which temple ye are"
Every other week I drive some of the Jr High aged kids in our ward to school. I often comment on the girls we see on our drive. I am amazed that some of them are even allowed to leave the house in the morning, looking like they do. They have their boobs hanging out of their tank tops, and their butts hanging out of their short shorts. They have piercings and tattoos. I feel bad for my son who has to look at them, and then try his hardest to control the thoughts that, I'm sure, come racing into his mind. Modesty isn't only for girls, even though it usually is directed towards them. I think, not only of my teenage boy who is trying to control his thoughts, but also the male teachers at the school who have to look at the scantily clad teenage girls as well. Are any of them thinking about how smart and witty she is, or something else? I can guarantee it's 'something else'.
I love this quote from Robert D. Hales,
"Some Latter-day Saints may feel that modesty is a tradition of the Church or that it has evolved from conservative, puritanical behavior. Modesty is not just cultural. Modesty is a gospel principle that applies to people of all cultures and ages. In fact, modesty is fundamental to being worthy of the Spirit. To be modest is to be humble, and being humble invites the Spirit to be with us."
I think about this body of mine. I think about the fact that it's a gift. One given to me by my Heavenly Father. A temple in which my Spirit resides. Would I be comfortable standing in front of my Heavenly Father in the clothing I choose to wear on a daily basis?
I love President Hinckley. He was so wise, and in tune with what was going on in the lives of the youth of the church, as well as youth throughout the world. He was keenly aware of the struggles and temptations to go the "ways of the world". This is one of my favorite things that he said about modesty:
"Young Women, modesty in dress and manner will assist in protecting against temptation. It may be difficult to find modest clothing, but it can be found with enough effort. I do not hesitate to say that you can be attractive without being immodest. You can be refreshing and buoyant and beautiful in your dress and in your behavior. Your appeal to others will come of your personality, which is the sum of your individual characteristics.
I am not asking you to be prudish. I am asking you to be virtuous, and I think there is a vast difference between the two."
I am thankful for the beautiful young woman who came into church last Sunday, dressed modestly, looking stunning, with her countenance shining. I am thankful that it was important to her to be modest. I am thankful that there are girls out there who aren't afraid to stand out and who aren't afraid of being referred to as "strange, quirky, or weird".
"...The temple of God is holy, which temple ye are"
