Children

I've been in the Primary Presidency in my ward for two years, and I can say, with great enthusiasm, that I have now put my second Primary Program under my belt and can breathe easy for another year...as far as Primary goes. It ended up being really good, if I do say so myself, but I always lose sleep the night after our program practice, wondering if it's all going to pull together and work out.
It's a truly harrowing experience...the primary program practice. It's one of those experiences, for me, that makes me think that pulling out my own fingernails, or poking my eyes out would be a less painful experience. Sorry for the graphic description, but I didn't know how to express in any other way how much I truly dread that practice. There were kids running around the church, laughing and loud, my president was trying to re-arrange the seating that I had spent 30 minutes arranging, the 1st counselor was yelling at the top of her lungs at the children--"stop", "sit down", "be quiet", "shut up", "listen", "sing louder"...well, you get the idea. Most of my teachers didn't show up, which I kind of expected, but was still ticked about. My pianist didn't show up...yep, you heard me right...no pianist, and I was ready to just sit down and cry. Luckily, however, we made it through our 2 hour practice and then I went home and cried. I shut myself in my bathroom and poured my heart out to my Heavenly Father. I asked for strength, patience, and guidance. A calm came over me, and I was able to put it all from my mind for a few hours.
Well, Sunday came...and the program went off without a hitch--as it always does. It was wonderful. I felt the Spirit so strongly. I was truly touched. As I was reading through a friends' blog today I was reminded of this scripture:
Mosiah Chapter 4 verse 15: But ye will teach them to walk in the ways of truth and soberness; ye will teach them to love one another, and to serve one another.
There is a lot of expectation in that scripture. There's so many times when I feel like my calling is a burden. I complain a lot. I sometimes take out my primary frustration on my family. I feel a lot of guilt when I think that what I'm teaching in my sharing time in Primary isn't good enough for the children there. And then there are those days when you wonder if they're even listening at all. But then I have a wonderful experience like I had on Sunday. It was crystal clear that they are learning what they are being taught in primary. It strengthened my testimony of my Heavenly Father and His Son. It strengthened my testimony of Joseph Smith and the restoration. I know that even when I don't think the children are listening, they are...and they hear everything. I'm thankful that the program reminded me that my calling isn't a burden, but a privilege and a blessing.